July 1, 2026

Behaviors, Not Intentions, Influence People

One of the most common misconceptions in leadership is believing that good intentions automatically produce good leadership. While intentions certainly matter to the person holding them, employees do not directly experience a supervisor's intentions. They experience the supervisor's behavior.

Every interaction between a supervisor and an employee communicates information even before words are spoken. Facial expressions, tone of voice, response time, body language, consistency, follow-through, listening, interruptions, recognition, and accountability all send signals that employees interpret. Those signals—not the supervisor's internal motives—become the basis for trust, psychological safety, and the quality of the working relationship (Edmondson, 2019; Goleman, 1998).

How Good Intentions May Be Lost
A supervisor may genuinely intend to be supportive while consistently appearing distracted during conversations. Another may intend to empower employees but frequently takes work back or micromanages decisions. A manager may believe they are treating everyone fairly, yet employees observe inconsistent standards or unequal opportunities. In each case, employees respond to the behaviors they repeatedly experience rather than the intentions the supervisor never communicates (Kahneman, 2011).

This occurs because people naturally rely on observable evidence when deciding whether someone is trustworthy, competent, or safe to follow. Our brains evolved over time to interpret social signals long before language became sophisticated enough to explain intentions. As a result, behavior becomes the primary source of information from which employees predict future interactions. Over time, consistent behaviors create expectations, and those expectations become an organization's culture (Cacioppo et al., 2015; Lieberman, 2013).

When supervisors defend themselves by saying, "That wasn't my intention," or “You misunderstood my intention,” they may be describing an internal truth, but they are not addressing the employee's actual perceived signals or experience. If several employees perceive the same behavior similarly, the leadership challenge is no longer about intent—it is about the signals being communicated. Effective leaders become curious about how their behavior is being interpreted instead of assuming their intentions are obvious. Research on emotional intelligence similarly emphasizes that self-awareness includes understanding not only one's internal state but also one's impact on others (Goleman, 1998).

This does not mean supervisors should ignore their intentions. Good intentions remain the foundation for ethical leadership and decision-making. However, intentions only become meaningful when they are translated into behaviors that employees can consistently and correctly observe. Leadership is not measured by what a supervisor hopes people feel; it is measured by what people actually experience (Edmondson, 2019).

Practical Applications

Supervisors can strengthen trust and improve relationships by asking themselves:

What behaviors are my employees consistently experiencing from me?
If someone observed my actions without hearing my explanations, what conclusions would they draw?
Are my behaviors reinforcing the values I want my team to know?
When employees misunderstand my intentions, do I become defensive, or do I examine the signals I may be sending?
What one behavior could I change this week that would better communicate trust, respect, or support?

Putting It All Together:

Great supervisors recognize that while they control their intentions internally, they influence others through their behavior externally. Employees cannot respond to what a leader means to communicate—they respond to what the leader actually communicates through consistent actions. The most effective leaders ensure that their behaviors accurately reflect the intentions they hope others will experience.

I normally close these out with quotes to put into practice, but here’s one that is from my upcoming book due to be released 12/8/2026: Signal and Response, How Biology and Behavior Shape Leader-Follower Synchrony:”

Signal and Response Principle: People do not respond to your intentions—they respond to the social signals your behavior communicates. If you want to change people's responses, begin by changing the signals you consistently send.

References (APA 7)

Cacioppo, J. T., Cacioppo, S., & Decety, J. (2015). The social neuroscience of interpersonal processes. In J. T. Cacioppo & G. G. Berntson (Eds.), Handbook of social neuroscience (pp. 151–171). Wiley.
Edmondson, A. C. (2019). The fearless organization: Creating psychological safety in the workplace for learning, innovation, and growth. Wiley.
Goleman, D. (1998). Working with emotional intelligence. Bantam Books.
Kahneman, D. (2011). Thinking, fast and slow. Farrar, Straus and Giroux.
Lieberman, M. D. (2013). Social: Why our brains are wired to connect. Crown Publishers.